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Netflix’s “Bonding” is Much More Than a BDSM Show

A man and a woman standing next to each other

Get those leather boots and harnesses ready because Netflix wants to dom your night with their latest show, BONDiNG. This dark comedy is about a dominatrix who makes her gay best friend become her assistant. All seven episodes average 15 minutes in length, so you’ll devour this quicker than a Thanksgiving meal and by the time you’re done, you’ll be DMing the director, Rightor Doyle and begging for a second season. I mean, I know I did.

One of the highlights is the way they portray the double standard between gays and straights when it comes to kinks. There’s a scene where we see Tiff/Mistress May having a candid conversation with Pete/ Master Carter about how gays are generally celebrated for exploring their fetishes but for straights, judgement follows. Can straight culture finally learn from queers and accept everyone for who they are without judgement? Yes, please.

There’s a lot of casual BDSM teaching such as the funny side of having a boyfriend twin, a really scruffy and almost naked Matthew Wilkas with a terrible German accent, and the potentially violent consequences of going to a stranger’s house for a hookup, or sex work. However, don’t be shook by what you’re reading because BONDiNG is more than a kink show. It’s about finding yourself and not judging a book by its cover. It’s also about how we seek genuine connections and work hard to maintain friendships.

The whole alias of the lead characters Mistress May and Master Carter made me want to come up with a new name for myself. By using this “persona” the characters were able to explore themselves and have the confidence to really showcase their strengths and push their boundaries without prejudice. I know we shouldn’t need to create a whole persona to find confidence but maybe it’s time to come up with an alter ego like Raw Ryan to find it.

We need more sex-positive TV with no slut-shaming that really portrays how we talk about sex. Because, let’s be real, who hasn’t talked explicitly about their one-night stand during brunch with a stroller at the next table? Please don’t tell me I’m alone in this one.

Check out the whole trailer below.


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